


Start Again

by malapropist (enbookcased)



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: ALL THE FLUFF, Aged-Up Character(s), Dad!Seungmin, Divorce, F/M, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Mentioned Hwang Hyunjin, Minor Bang Chan/Lee Felix, Minor Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin, Pining, Producer Seo Changbin, Teacher Seungmin, a wannabe 5+1 that fell massively short, all the Hallmark tropes I could feasibly stuff in one fic without making myself sick, cute kid alert, preemie baby mention, she's fine she just came a little earlier than expected
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:15:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26490037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enbookcased/pseuds/malapropist
Summary: Changbin had barely reacted when Seungmin called him up that rainy, foggy autumn day, a tremor in his throat. All he had asked was what Seungmin needed from him; it was like no time had passed since they'd last spoken, though it had been several months. Conflicted, Seungmin hadn't asked for anything but an ear, but still three days later Changbin had shown up on his doorstep. He'd taken one look at Seungmin's sad, unwashed, unshaven self and pulled a squalling Daeun from his arms and ordered him to take a bath.And he'd stayed.
Relationships: Kim Seungmin/Original Female Character(s), Kim Seungmin/Seo Changbin
Comments: 37
Kudos: 268
Collections: Seungmin-Centric Ficfest





	Start Again

**Author's Note:**

> For Seungfest 2020! Thank you mod for running this fest!
> 
> Prompt: "Person A and Person B are ex-best friends. When they were younger, they made a pact that they would marry each other if they are still single at the age of 29. Fast forward years later, they crossed paths again and they are still both single."
> 
> Dear prompternim, I loved your prompt and I hope this comes at least a little close to what you were asking for.
> 
> Note: In this fic, Eunbi is an OC and is not associated with Eunbi from IZ*ONE, Gfriend, or any other idol.
> 
> Songs I listened to a lot while writing this: Mixtape: On Track, Stray Kids; Dinner, Suho & Jane Jang; with you, The Rose; Winter Bear, V and ofc Seungmin's gorgeous cover of Gaho's Start which the fic is titled after
> 
> T rating for a few swear words sprinkled within. I tried to make this fic the embodiment of the 🥰 emoji. 🥰masternim, I hope I did you justice.
> 
> My [twitter](https://twitter.com/enbookcased). My [tumblr](https://binracha.tumblr.com/).

Growing up, there was one apartment separating Kim Seungmin and Seo Changbin. The Kims lived in #304, and the Seos in #308, with #306 dividing them. Residing in #306 was Park Chan Young and his ‘friend’ Lee Jeong Hoon. The friends were unmarried men in their thirties, both accountants, both very nice and kind people, who wore matching rings on their left hands and both Changbin and Seungmin were not fooled in the slightest as to their relationship with one another. It was this intrinsic knowledge that led to a very important, defining conversation between a pair of adolescent best friends who were about to be separated in a way they never had before and would, ultimately, set a course in their lives they would never fully stray from, no matter how hard the world tried.

But first:

Seungmin sighed, allowing gravity to do its job and letting his backpack slide down his arm to the floor. He kicked it, making a face, then toed off his shoes and let them clatter next to the door, not bothering with any slippers. He slumped his way down the hallway until he came to his room, not stopping until his knees hit his bed. Then he tipped forward and fell onto it, letting out a groan he’d been saving for just that moment.

He heard his door close before he felt a weight above his head and peeked out with one eye. Seo Changbin, his very, very, _very_ best friend of three whole years, sat cross-legged in front of him. “Minnie,” Changbin chided, clucking his tongue just like Seungmin’s grandma had taught him two summers ago. “You’re being dramatic.”

“I am NOT,” Seungmin pouted, screwing his face up and pressing it into his comforter so Changbin wouldn’t see.

“You are,” Changbin poked at the top of Seungmin’s head, then when that didn’t work, started pulling on the tops of his ears. “It’s just one year, and then we’ll be back together.”

“What if I don’t get into the same middle school as you?” Seungmin asked, finally voicing the concerns that had been haunting him during quiet times, like right before he fell asleep at night, or during self-study time in class. “What if I eat a big bowl of spicy noodles the night before my exams and I flunk them all because I keep having to go to the bathroom? What if I accidentally insult the exam proctor and they flunk me on principle?”

Changbin rolled his eyes. “Then don’t eat spicy noodles the night before an exam. And you’re the politest person on the planet, Seungminnie, there’s no way you could insult anyone _that_ bad. Except maybe me.”

“I can’t help that your face just begs to be insulted, hyung.”

Changbin screeched and hit Seungmin over the head with his own pillow, which, hey. He laughed, blocking it with his hands before grabbing it and yanking it away for his own assault. Soon, they were both on their knees on Seungmin’s little twin, making it sway dangerously as they pummeled each other.

“Hey—ow!” Changbin protested as he took a feather down pillow right across the face. “Damn, Min, hold on!”

Seungmin stopped, his mouth dropping open at the curse word. He and Changbin had only recently been trying them out, and only when they were absolutely certain no one else was around to hear. “Hyung, my mom might be home!” he hissed, voice low.

“She’s not, she would have already come in and offered us a snack by now,” Changbin replied with all the surety a whole eleven months seniority could bring. “Seungmin, I just had an idea. Maybe we need to make a pact.”

Seungmin gave Changbin a puzzled look. “A pact? How will a pact help?”

“Well, if we have a pact between us, that will be like we’re bound to one another, right? So even if we end up at different schools, we’ll still be connected because we made a pact together.”

“But what kind of pact?”

“I dunno, something like we promise to always be with each other. Or one that states if we get separated, we always try to find one another.”

“Find one another… be together? Like, as in Mr. Lee and Mr. Park?”

Changbin’s mouth lifted to one side, a bemused smirk. “I mean… I guess?” He tapped Seungmin’s arm. “Sure, why not. If we get separated, then we’ll make a pact to get back together like Mr. Lee and Mr. Park by the time we’re twenty-nine. Rings and all. I’ll even give you a piggyback ride.”

“You’ll—hey! Who says I won’t be the one giving you a piggyback ride?!”

“You’re too short to give me one. Ow,” Changbin laughed, clutching his arm where Seungmin slugged him. “Okay, okay, we can both give each other piggyback rides. Deal?”

Seungmin stuck his hand out, but immediately retracted it as he thought of something. “Why twenty-nine?”

Changbin shrugged. “Well, what if I find some cutie to marry when I’m older? I don’t want to be stuck looking at your dumb face for eternity if I don’t have to. But I figure, by twenty-nine we’ll be, like, _old_. No one is gonna want us by then. So, whaddaya say?”

Changbin held out his pinkie finger, and Seungmin thought about it for a long moment before he looped his own with it. “Deal.”

\--

They stood at an altar, but it felt like a precipice. Seungmin tried to keep his composure, tried to remain stoic; tried to keep from sweating his foundation off. But a woman was walking toward him down the aisle clutching a bouquet of peonies his mother insisted upon, and his whole life was about to change.

Changbin was a steadying presence next to him as his best man. He was the only thing keeping him from running out of that room, if Seungmin were to be completely honest.

But he was far past honesty by that point.

They’d decided on a modern wedding. Eunbi was a vision in white, but Seungmin couldn’t help but think, wildly, that she was someone else’s vision. When he took her hand and turned toward the officiant, Seungmin glanced over at Changbin, who was staring back at him, eyes clear. He nodded. “You can do this,” it said. Seungmin swallowed and faced forward. If Changbin thought he could do this, then he could do this. He could marry his high school sweetheart and move across the country and—and—

“Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?”

Staring forward, Seungmin took a deep breath. “I do.”

\--

It was barely a week after the wedding, and all of Seungmin’s earthly possessions were packed into a blue Honda hatchback he and Eunbi had bought second-hand when they realized they weren’t going to be living in Seoul (and quite as near highly available public transit) any longer.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think I’m going to miss your blue hair. And all the ear piercings. Without me around, you’ll have no one to keep you in check, or tell you how stupid you’d look with a barbell through your tongue.”

“Don’t worry, I have a distinctly Seungmin-sounding voice in the back of my head at all times warning me not to do dumb things,” Changbin chided, the corner of his mouth lifted up. The rest of him was muted, as gray as the day, fingertips peeking out of the long sleeves of one of Seungmin’s rattier hoodies from middle school.

They had ended up at the same school after all, high school, too, and Seungmin would be forever indebted to his closest hyung for all the guidance he had given him throughout the years. For all the advice, class and otherwise, but especially when Eunbi had bought Seungmin a milk during study period and smiled at him. Seungmin had felt plunged into the deep end of the school pool, and it was Changbin who taught him how to sink or swim, even though Seungmin knew he had not the first idea about relationships himself.

Changbin had remained unattached their entire school career, and though their paths forked once Seungmin entered university and Changbin had signed on as a producer at his current company, Seungmin was fairly certain his hyung hadn’t ever had a relationship that had lasted past a few dates. Though Seungmin was admittedly distracted with his schooling and Eunbi. Eunbi, his girlfriend-cum-wife, his soulmate. It was something he reminded himself as he looked at Changbin in his hoodie, putting a box filled with Seungmin’s socks and underwear in the back of the car and felt his heart thump dully, albeit painfully, in his chest.

“So Eunbi will be joining you later?”

Seungmin nodded, shoving a couple boxes further toward the back so he could fit his textbooks in the space as well. “Her and her parents are going to take a train down. Her mom wanted one last day together.”

Changbin smiled, wistful. “I wish I could come with you. Stupid work.”

“You’d just play terrible Soundcloud hip hop the whole time, hyung, so really, I’m glad you’re staying here,” Seungmin joked, trying to keep the atmosphere light. But Changbin was looking at him with that same fond look he always gave Seungmin, and it was making his face scrunch up and his eyes itch. “I don’t want to go.” _I don’t want to leave you._

Changbin reached out and tweaked Seungmin’s nose. “It’s really a great opportunity,” he reminded Seungmin, closing the hatch and clapping the dust off his hands, then gripped Seungmin’s shoulder, looking up at him directly. “You’d be a fool to say no.”

“I know, I’m just really going to miss—here.” Seungmin grimaced, resigned. He had to remind himself of all the blessings he’d received in life. “The job is a dream, and I can continue my education at the local college, not to mention the fact that Eunbi was able to secure something in Busan, too. It’s a lot, but with her by my side, I know I can do it.” Seungmin held up his fist.

After a breath of a pause, one where Changbin’s eyebrows drew together a little too long, he held his up, too. “Hwaiting!” Then he pulled Seungmin into a tight hug.

If there were wet marks soaked into the shoulders of each of their shirts when they let go, no one was mentioning it.

\--

They settled in their little seaside suburb outside of Busan in no time. Their little three-bedroom townhouse was on the way up a picturesque hill, the air clearer here, the smells different. Every weekend there were market stalls in what quantified as their little downtown, and Seungmin bought Eunbi skewers the day she finally moved in. They didn’t have a lot to bring with them, but the townhouse came thankfully furnished, so they didn’t need much anyway, just each other. Seungmin started two days later at the local middle school teaching concert band and immediately signed on to become an advisor for the choir club. They met a sweet couple named Felix and Chan who lived down the road with their dog, Berry. He didn’t need much more in his life. Coming home to Eunbi’s smiling face was enough. Seungmin told himself he was content.

He didn’t mean to fall out of contact with Changbin. It just happened. One day, his best friend occupied so much of his day-to-day life and the next, he didn’t. Seungmin could blame the distance. He could blame the job. He could blame his studies, or Eunbi.

But the ugly truth, the one that he tucked deep down inside of him, was that he didn’t want to know how Changbin was doing. How he was getting along in his exciting new career as an idol producer, writing chart-topping hits for his company’s groups and living his fabulous life in Seoul, away from Seungmin. Seungmin didn’t like thinking about Changbin being happy and fulfilled away from him, and anyway it wasn’t like Changbin was going out of his way to contact him, either, and he knew it was a selfish, ugly thought so he stashed it deep, deep down, and with it their friendship. And it was horrible, but so was he. He hated the feeling and he hated himself for having it. So it was better not to think of it at all. His life was Eunbi and their home and his teaching job and his graduate studies. Besides, friendships were meant to fade as people got older, right? This was natural. This was how it was supposed to be.

\--

The day Daeun was born was the day that Seungmin learned that sometimes clichés existed because they were steeped in truth. It truly was the happiest day of his life. Holding his infant daughter in his arms made all the problems in the world just disappear around him. It was him and Daeun and she was tiny, and wrinkled, and crying, and perfect. His parents and Eunbi joked that she had inherited his lungs with the way she was howling, but Seungmin touched one finger to her little cheek and she instantly calmed. Her wide dark eyes a masterpiece as they looked up at him.

Daeun came early, was bright red from the start, and had to stay in the neonatal unit for a few weeks before she could be discharged. Seungmin visited every day, inching through the Busan traffic after work to take over for Eunbi by her side. The only day he missed was the day before Daeun was scheduled to come home, fighting with a crib that had been a box only a few hours earlier.

It was during that, while he had pieces of espresso-colored pressed wood all around him, when he felt his phone go off in his pocket. Taking it out, he instantly felt guilt at the name flashing across the screen. Pressing the green button, he held it to his ear. “Changbin-hyung!”

“I hear congratulations are in order,” came the voice, tinny but unmistakable.

“I suppose so.” Seungmin could hear the sheepishness bleeding through his tone. “How’d you, uh…”

“Jeongin told me when he came into the studio earlier today. He’s guesting as a favor on an OST I’m producing. Don’t be too mad at him, I practically twisted his arm to get the information.”

Seungmin grimaced. “Hyung, I’ve been meaning to call you, it’s just—there were a few complications and Daeun had to stay in the NICU for a while. We’ve kind of had tunnel vision—”

“Oh my gosh, Minnie, there’s no need to apologize! Is she going to be okay? Do you need anything?”

“She’s fine, hyung, she’s actually coming home tomorrow. We’ve—I mean, it’s been a crazy few months, but we’re doing okay, Eunbi and I. I—” _I’ve missed you_. He was surprised how much he meant those words. Despite the distance, despite the time that had lapsed, Seungmin could picture Changbin as clear in his head as if he had seen him only yesterday. 

“Well, that’s what I get for deactivating all my socials, I guess. But I’d love a picture sometime, after you three get settled. My Seungminnie is all grown up with his own little family, I can hardly believe it. Smelly Seungminnie with an ickle baby,” Seungmin grinned in spite of himself at the teasing tone of Changbin’s voice, “going to teach her math and how to do a perfect vocal run, I can picture it now.”

“Hyung,” Seungmin drawled, clearing the thickness in his throat and leaning back against the matching dresser, playing idly with the Allen wrench that came with the furniture. He could feel how wide his mouth was split; his cheeks hurt a little from it. It was silent for a moment, but it felt comfortable. He cradled the phone between his ear and his shoulder and drew his legs up, hugging his knees. That was the way he and Changbin used to sit, side-by-side in the gym after school, shoulders bumping. Sitting like that, Changbin’s voice low and soft in his ear, for a while Seungmin didn’t feel so uncertain about the future. “I think I’m really going to like being a dad.”

“You’re going to be the best dad, Min.”

\--

Seungmin kept that sentiment tucked in close, because sometimes it was the only thing that got him through some days.

Changbin and Daeun finally got to meet face-to-face when she was around nine months old. Not yet walking but pulling herself up every chance she got, she climbed Changbin like a tree and developed a fascination with grabbing his nose with her tiny baby fists and Seungmin watched his hyung fall impossibly in love for the first time ever, probably. Daeun and Changbin were natural cohorts, both loud and babie and wow, was it a bad idea to put those two together. They got on like a house on fire and Seungmin was both endeared and deeply worried for his material possessions around their boisterous playing.

Daeun wasn’t a difficult child, but she was born with a couple difficulties that meant extra doctor visits and a specialized diet and she was set back developmentally just a bit. It was nothing lasting, her doctors insisted, and she would catch up with her peers in no time, but it was a challenge nonetheless.

It wasn’t Daeun that caused his and Eunbi’s relationship to disintegrate.

Seungmin wouldn’t say they fell out of love because that wasn’t it in the slightest. When Seungmin thought of Eunbi, the word ‘love’ still resonated. He loved her as the mother to his child, as his high school sweetheart, as the woman he married and shared his life with for almost six years. They would always have that to connect them, no matter what happened. But he stopped looking forward to coming home to her, and he could see quite plainly that she felt the same way. They worked, they really did, for a while, for Daeun’s sake, but a relationship built on only keeping a toddler happy was no relationship at all.

They decided together to end it. Seungmin was going to keep the house and Eunbi would move to an apartment in Busan and they would share custody of Daeun. It wasn’t perfect, but it was better. Seungmin called Changbin the night after and cried silently. Changbin didn’t say much either, and instead they stayed on the phone, listening to each other breathe. Seungmin was pretty certain he heard Changbin cry with him.

The divorce was quiet, simple. They were not enemies, Seungmin and Eunbi, and they refused to drag things out for Daeun’s sake.

For six months, it worked. And then the company Eunbi worked for offered a promotion as regional manager of their branch in Kyoto and she’d said yes.

Seungmin convinced himself he could float being a single dad to a toddler on his own. For a month, it worked, but only barely. And then Seungmin got a text from a number he’d almost forgotten, once, not too long ago, but one he’d promised never to forget again.

 _I was thinking about coming to visit my favorite niece again. How is she? How are you?_ the text asked.

Changbin had barely reacted when Seungmin called him up that rainy, foggy autumn day, a tremor in his throat. All he had asked was what Seungmin needed from him; it was like no time had passed since they'd last spoken, though it had been several months. Conflicted, Seungmin hadn't asked for anything but an ear, but still three days later Changbin had shown up on his doorstep. He'd taken one look at Seungmin's sad, unwashed, unshaven self and pulled a squalling Daeun from his arms and ordered him to take a bath.

And he'd stayed.

\--

Seungmin sighed, pulling a hand through his hair for the hundredth time that night. He needed a haircut, he reminded himself at least one more time since the last. As if he'd ever remember. The laptop screen was starting to give him a headache, but he still had so many assignments to grade for the morning. It felt daunting. He needed a break. He needed a scotch.

A soft giggle rose him out of his stupor, and Seungmin decided that a break was going to happen sooner rather than later. He put his laptop aside and went investigating.

What he found did not disappoint. Daeun was in her rightful place as princess of the castle, riding atop Changbin’s shoulders, fistfuls of his hair clasped (painfully) in her tiny, plump hands. “Pegus! Pegus!” she giggled joyfully as Changbin zoomed around the room, pretending to fly. They were both wearing tiaras, Changbin’s pushed forward and nearly falling off his head due to little fingers. Seungmin leaned against the doorway, watching the tableau unfold in front of him, a smirk on his face.

“Having fun?”

“Daddy!” Daeun squealed, reaching out with grabby hands toward her father. Changbin zoomed her toward him, who plucked her from Changbin’s shoulders to spin her around, delighting in the happy squeal she let out. Seungmin propped her on his hip and reached out, straightening Changbin’s tiara.

“That’s a good look on you.”

“Thanks, I was trying out something new. Might make it a regular thing.”

“Gonna be the next concept you pitch? Boys in tiaras?”

“Not really my area, but possibly. Think the company would go for it? It could be my debut.”

Seungmin shrugged, scrunching his face as he put a squirmy Daeun back down, who instantly went running for her toy box. He grimaced as Changbin reached up and pinched the tip of his nose. “I’m not a hundred percent sure pink is your color, hyung. Maybe red.”

“Red! Purple! Blue!” was Daeun’s contribution. She’d recently been learning her colors. She still had some work to do on getting them right.

“Ohh, yeah maybe. That’s right, Daeun-ah,” Changbin leaned down and tickled Daeun’s tummy as she ran past him, using that baby voice that instantly got Daeun to do whatever he wanted. Seungmin didn’t think he would ever understand the power Changbin’s dumb voices wielded over his child. But it was cute to watch.

“Are you done with your grading?” he asked while Daeun submerged herself in her toy box, stuffed animals flying.

Seungmin calmly reached over and righted his only child. “Not yet, but I’m taking a break. My head’s about to explode.”

Daeun looked up with wide eyes. “Appa, don’t let your head explode!”

Seungmin smiled down at Daeun. “I won’t, baby. You don’t have to worry. Daddy’s head isn’t going anywhere.”

He caught the wide-eyed, pressed-lip, _thoroughly_ entertained look on Changbin’s face a second before Daeun burst into tears. “Appa’s gonna take off his head and leave it here when he goes!” she cried.

Seungmin looked over at Changbin helplessly.

\--

Changbin entered the room softly, but Seungmin still looked up. “She get down okay?”

Changbin nodded. “Fast asleep with her new Binniecorn clutched in her arms.”

Seungmin felt his mouth quirk. “Sorry she keeps naming all her stuffies after you.”

Changbin fell down onto the couch, stretching out. “What are you talking about? I’m flattered. This is better than any fan letter I’ve ever received, even if she does tell me I don't sing as well as Appa.” He arched his back and groaned appreciatively as Seungmin heard a series of pops that had to be coming from Changbin’s spine. He winced.

“I poured you a glass,” he said, holding it out toward Changbin.

“Oh, you didn’t have to do that,” Changbin said, accepting the glass and taking a sniff of the red Seungmin had decided on that night. He knew how much Changbin liked his Malbec. Seungmin knew he chose well by the way Changbin closed his eyes, savoring the first sip. “I love you for it, anyway.”

“I know you do,” Seungmin smirked, attention back on his work. He could feel Changbin looking at him, though, and when he glanced up, Changbin’s gaze was heavy. “Hyung?”

That seemed to snap Changbin out of whatever thought he’d been in the middle of. “Hmm? Oh, nothing. I’ll warm up dinner, shall I?”

“…Sure. Thanks, hyung.”

The side of Changbin’s mouth quirked in an expression Seungmin recognized as his distracted look. “No problem,” he murmured, getting up and heading toward the kitchen. As he passed behind Seungmin, he squeezed his shoulder. It was something they used to do all the time. Still, Seungmin waited until Changbin was out of the room before he rubbed the spot he had touched. 

They ate that night, like most nights, bumping knees at the breakfast nook in Seungmin's kitchen, neither of them wanting to go to all the fuss eating in the dining room would cause. Besides, there was something cozy about it, sharing the same space, practically shoulder to shoulder, sometimes with Daeun between them in her booster chair. It was not something Seungmin remembered doing much with Eunbi, mostly due to their varying schedules.

Tonight it was just them because Seungmin's club meeting ran late, the only light in the room coming from the oven range hood, bathing them in soft, warm tones. They shared a single plate of japchae, piled high on a bed of rice, elbows clashing but they didn't really care, both worn down from the day and too used to being in each other's space to really mind. It was how things used to be, all those years ago, spending late nights at their school studying together and whole weekends at each other's homes. They spent so much of their lives together _before_ that it was practically muscle memory to settle back down into these familiar routines.

“I’ll be driving into Busan tomorrow. Got some stuff I need to take care of at the office,” Changbin mentioned, leaning back in his chair and sipping his wine.

Seungmin looked up. “Not satisfied with the vocal recordings from last week?”

“Actually, I’ve decided to mentor that intern, Hyunjin. He texted me some of his poetry and it was pretty solid, and I think he’d be a great producer one day once he has the knowledge. Promised him I’d let him hang out while I worked on some songs, let him get a feel for things, get used to the programs. The company doesn’t even know what kind of talent they’ve got hidden all the way out here.” Changbin smiled around a mouthful of rice and vegetables. “I’m glad I came.”

Seungmin tucked a smile down into his food. He was glad, too.

\--

The subject of dating came up after Changbin met Chan and Felix for the first time.

“Well, they were pleasant,” Changbin said after closing the door and walking back into the living room. Seungmin had invited them over to meet Changbin, since they were Seungmin’s oft-used babysitters whenever he had to go into the city or run a few errands and taking Daeun with him just plain didn’t make sense. They only ever kept Daeun for a handful of hours at a time, but they had been a lifesaver for Seungmin before Changbin had shown up. “Really pretty, too, the both of them. I think I spent the entire dinner trying to decide who was prettier.”

“Felix,” Seungmin answered without hesitation. He looked up as Changbin froze over the drink he’d just poured himself, his mind tracking back over his own words. “Oh. Sorry. Was that rude of me? Chan is good-looking, too, of course, if you go for that sort of surfer vibe. I like men that are a bit more put together, I think. I don’t mind a little ruggedness, though.”

Changbin coughed into his glass, putting it down and wiping his mouth. “Duly noted. Ah, Seungminnie,” Seungmin could tell from the tone that Changbin was unsure about what he was about to bring up, which automatically had his shoulders stiffening. “Have you… you know, ever thought about getting back out there? Dating, I mean?”

Seungmin knew his face was giving away his thoughts on the matter. He could feel how pinched his mouth was at that moment. “Not really,” he hedged, shrugging. “Isn’t it too soon?”

“It’s been almost a year since the divorce. At this rate, I’ll have to evoke our pact.”

Seungmin looked over at Changbin blankly. “Our pact?”

“Do you remember? The one we made when we were kids?” Changbin rolled his eyes at Seungmin’s continued blank stare. “The one that said we would get married if we were both single by the time we’re twenty-nine.”

“Oh my God,” Seungmin sat back, laughing. “I completely forgot about that. Wow.”

Changbin hiked an eyebrow at him. “Well? Are we getting hitched or what?”

Seungmin shook his head, scoffing. “Okay, hyung. So you won’t be stuck looking at my ‘dumb face for eternity,’ I guess I can try dating again.”

\--

Seungmin straightened his tie. “Are you sure this looks okay? It’s not too stuffy?”

“Seungminnie, _you’re_ stuffy. It’s who you are. Why hide it? If the date goes well, and you keep seeing each other, the truth will out itself eventually. Might as well lead with it.”

“…Hey,” Seungmin said weakly, feeling like he should defend himself but not entirely sure which part he should start with. He felt like a John Mulaney bit.

“You’re perfect, now get going.” Changbin slapped Seungmin’s collar down one last time and guided him out of the walk-in closet with one hand on his shoulder. “You don’t want to be late. Not because it would make a bad impression, but I know that it would bug the hell out of you if you showed up even one minute late.”

“I feel like I’m only beginning to understand how well you know me, hyung,” Seungmin muttered.

“You have no idea,” Changbin replied under his breath, like Seungmin wasn’t supposed to hear that, or if he was, it wasn’t up for comment. Seungmin filed that away to puzzle over later.

Standing at the front door, Seungmin turned around. “What, not going to wish me luck?”

Changbin grinned up at him. “Break a leg!” He patted Seungmin on the shoulder and then physically turned him around.

“I think that’s something you only tell performers,” Seungmin replied.

“Well, this is a performance of sorts, isn’t it? Besides, it’s the best you’re getting out of me right now, if you stall any longer, you’re going to be late.”

“You’ve got all the numbers programmed into your phone, right? My parents, Daeun’s doctor, the children’s hospital, mine…”

“Seungmin, if you don’t head out the door this moment, I will push you to your car.”

“I’m going! I’m going!”

\--

Seungmin pulled open his car door and slumped into the driver's seat gratefully, blowing out a breath. Whew. He was glad that was over with. Who knew dates could be so taxing? Before Eunbi, Seungmin had barely dated around. Before Eunbi, the only person Seungmin invested spending any time with was Changbin. He wasn't so much rusty at the dating scene as completely out of his depth.

The date had gone… okay, if he was being generous. Jia, the niece of the school secretary, was plenty nice and easy to talk to, but when the topic of kids came up, she seemed less than enthused. She was also so young, barely out of college, and she wanted to travel. Seungmin was settled in his life, he had a mortgage, sure there were places he'd love to take Daeun to visit, but he highly doubted they were the same places a single 24-year-old woman would want to go. And when he ordered dessert, she had visibly stuck her nose up at it; Seungmin ended up getting it to go, he was so ready to get out of there. Ready for the date to be over already.

“I'm home,” he called out faintly as he stepped through the door, cardboard container in one hand. He exchanged out his shoes for slippers and headed down the hall.

Changbin stuck his head out the door of Daeun's room and smiled at Seungmin. “You’re home early. How was the date?”

“I'm not really sure you could qualify it as a date,” Seungmin replied, nose wrinkled. He walked over to Daeun's toddler bed, where Changbin was in the middle of tucking her in for the night and sat on the edge. “How’s my sweet little mochi?” he cooed.

“Appa!” she squealed excitedly, launching herself at Seungmin, who caught her easily and wrapped her in a big hug. “You came back!”

“I told you he would be in time to sing you a lullaby! Now do you believe me?” Changbin pretended to pout, folding his arms in front of himself.

“Uncle Binnie, don't be sad. I believe you!” Daeun launched herself from Seungmin to Changbin, who caught her in midair and then pretended to powerbomb her to the bed, placing her down gently and making her giggle.

Once they finally got Daeun tucked into bed (and read three stories, complete with voices, and sang four songs), Changbin closed the bedroom door then dusted off his pants. “So! Tell me everything, including what's in that box,” he tapped the takeaway Seungmin still had in his hands.

“Oh, the box, you ask? What's in the box? Only,” Seungmin made a production out of opening the top, “tiramisu, nothing special.”

Changbin’s gaze lit up then turned sly. “Any chance you'd be willing to part with half of that if I told you I've already got a Rosé left to breathe in the kitchen?”

“I could be tempted.” Seungmin grinned, feeling instantly lighter. He hated being away from Daeun, even for a few hours. He hated being away from home.

Changbin pulled on his tie to direct him to the kitchen and Seungmin breathed a sigh of relief. He was never doing that again.

\--

He was doing it again.

“Just wait until you meet my cousin, you’ll love him!” Daeun’s preschool teacher gushed.

He did not, in fact, love him. He’s sure he would have been delightful, if he had ever gotten the chance to meet him. But alas, that wasn’t to be. He still wasn’t entirely sure he understood the hastily-texted excuse. Something about someone named Jiwoo and pineapple pizza. Pineapple absolutely did not belong on pizza, so Seungmin assumed he dodged a bullet there.

He texted Changbin about the no-show and to let him know he would be coming home earlier than expected and flagged a server down. Before he could say anything, his phone lit up with an incoming text. Expecting it to be a simple acknowledgement from Changbin, he was perplexed when instead it read, “ _wait ten minutes_.” Wait ten minutes for what? Seungmin stared down at his phone as if it had betrayed him for a good, long moment, until the server reminded him of their presence with a polite cough and pitying smile. “Oh, sorry. Um, could I get an order of the grilled camembert and cherries to start with? And, uh, a glass of whatever Chardonnay you have on hand would be fine. Thank you.” He handed the cardstock menu back to the server and smiled as they whisked away.

The smile dropped as soon as he was alone again, and he picked at the fine cutlery on the beautifully set table for two before him. Really, what was he thinking, setting up a blind date in such a fancy place? This was a restaurant designed for office parties and engagements, not to meet his daughter’s teacher’s cousin on the off chance they might have something in common to talk about for forty minutes while they ate. No wonder the guy canceled; he probably thought he was going to get saddled with a hefty bill that would have him choosing between it and paying his heating bill that month. Seungmin likely scared the poor guy off.

“Seungmin-ah.”

Seungmin looked up, a furrow in his brow that instantly lightened when he saw who was addressing him. He stood up on reflex. “Changbin-hyung! Wh—?”

Changbin held up a quelling hand. “Daeun is with Felix and Chan. Her and Berry are having a little impromptu play date.” Changbin unbuttoned his suit jacket and took the seat opposite Seungmin. “So he didn’t show, huh?”

“I guess not—why are _you_ here, though?”

Changbin smirked. “Hey, why waste a perfectly good date just because the right guy didn’t show up, you know what I mean? Besides, I’ve been wanting an excuse to try this place out, everyone back in Seoul only knows one thing about this tiny little seaside town and it is this restaurant, apparently. It got recommended to me so many times when I told people where I was going that I feel I should consider investing in it. Have you ordered yet?”

Seungmin should have felt annoyingly railroaded by Changbin and his pushy ways, but… no, he never did, did he? And especially not then. Changbin had, unknowingly or not, saved Seungmin from a fate worse than death in a small town: becoming gossip fodder. If the server had given him one more pitying look as the hour drug on, Seungmin was not going to be held responsible for his actions. (Which wouldn’t have been much more than politely bowing his way through the entire restaurant staff on his way to go pout in his car alone. An act of rebellion, to be sure.)

Speaking of: “Would the gentleman like a drink to start off the night?”

“I’ll have whatever he’s having, thanks.” Changbin leaned over before the server was completely out of earshot and whispered, loudly, “What is it you’re having, anyway?”

Seungmin giggled. “Should have asked that before you sealed your fate.”

“Oh, shit, is it a white? Minnie,” Changbin whined.

“You can’t subsist on red wine alone, hyung. You’ll turn purple at this rate.”

“Are you calling me a drunk?”

And thus the night continued on.

Seungmin wound up having a rather good time out with Changbin. Probably loads better than if his actual date had managed to show. They escorted each other out into the night, Seungmin calling an Uber rather than taking public transport, and they’d each had three glasses of wine. To be concise, they were both feeling it. Seungmin laughed as he leaned against Changbin, which, he realized, must’ve looked hilarious given their height difference, and that sent him into another spate of unending giggles.

“I don’t know what’s so funny,” Changbin’s face was red and puffy from the wine and Seungmin found it entirely too adorable, “so you better share. Unless it’s about me, then you can shove it.”

Seungmin let out a noise that Changbin always swore sounded just like a teapot going off, trying to rein in his laughter. “I’m shoving!”

“I’ll shove _you_!”

They batted at each other, trying to simultaneously grab each other’s wrists and avoid one another, which was working about as well as it sounded when the Uber pulled up. They both had to sign waivers that they would pay for any damages if either of them vomited in the vehicle, a contract of dubious legality, given neither of them were what one would consider ‘of sound mind’. Still, they made it home okay, and even managed to get the giggling (mostly) under control by the time Felix dropped Daeun back home.

\--

After the first bumbling week where they felt each other out, Seungmin and Changbin had gotten cleaning the kitchen after dinner down to a science. If Seungmin filled the dishwasher, Changbin put away the leftovers and wiped the table. If Changbin cleaned up Daeun's inevitable mess (being a toddler was hard, man) then Seungmin swept the floor and took out the garbage. It was a synchronicity that Seungmin never had with Eunbi; he thought he'd be surprised by it, but with Changbin it made sense. They’d been best friends, after all. Practically family.

That explained the warmth Seungmin felt in his gut whenever Changbin smiled over at him, dishcloth in hand. It explained his own smile whenever Changbin’s shoulder nudged against Seungmin’s arm at the sink. The laugh Changbin always managed to get out of him when he’d dance Daeun around the room. The sweet, soft happiness he'd almost forgot existed that bloomed in his chest every time he heard Changbin laugh. It felt right because it _was_ right. Changbin _was family_. Or something that felt equivalent in his head.

It was this thought that lingered in Seungmin’s mind as Changbin called him over. “Seungmin.”

Seungmin peeked his head around the corner, spying Changbin by the living room window. “What is it, hyung?”

Changbin looked over, held his hand out. “Come here.”

Seungmin walked over without thought, linking hands with Changbin. “What—oh! It's snowing.”

“It is. Big, fat flakes, too.” Changbin's smile was soft. “Do you remember when we used to go sledding on that flood wall by your cousin’s apartment?”

Seungmin laughed. “Of course I do. Mostly I remember you flipping the sled disc all the time because you were so small. I'm half convinced that's why you work out all the time now.”

Changbin snorted. “You found me out. All those reps, just to stay put on the sled. How'd you know?”

“You were so tiny back then, hyung! It's hard to believe you were ever so small. Now—” Seungmin looked over at Changbin’s form, appreciative. “You're definitely not small now.”

It came out strange, that last bit. Like Seungmin's mouth was going dry. The air seemed to turn heavy, and for whatever reason Seungmin couldn't tear his eyes away from his hyung. He caught Changbin's gaze on the way up from staring at his mouth a little and flushed, feeling pinned down and delighting in it. Changbin's eyes were so heavy on his skin.

Changbin broke the stare first. “I'm still short, though. No amount of working out will change that.”

Seungmin cleared his throat, feeling off-balance. This was new. He decided to file it away for further ponderance when he had a moment to himself. “Hyung, you're exactly as you should be. If that's short as hell, then so be it.”

Changbin opened his mouth, head tilted in thought. “I—hey!”

Seungmin laughed and danced out of Changbin’s reach.

\--

“Seungmin, I need you to sing for me.”

Seungmin paused from taking his scarf off, eyes scanning the scene in front him. Daeun was perched on Changbin’s hip, hair in lopsided pigtails with a sippy cup stuck firmly to her mouth; Changbin was rocking and bouncing in a gentle, thoughtless rhythm while pacing around the living room, which looked like Toys R Us and Best Buy had had an epic battle within its walls and the winner was unclear. Changbin’s headphones were around his neck, hoodie threadbare with a couple froot loops stuck on the back where he likely sat on them.

“You need me to sing for you?” Seungmin echoed, cautious, taking off his outerwear and hanging it up carefully by the door, shaking the snow from his hair. “Why?”

“For a guide. If you don’t mind. Also, I took a couple samples of Daeun laughing. If you’re okay with me using them, you’re probably going to have to sign off on a few papers. Legality purposes.” Seungmin tried to remember the last time he’d seen Changbin looking so stressed, and was coming up blank. Changbin was a lot of things, but he usually projected an outward appearance of always having it together. This was new.

“Hyung, is everything okay?” Seungmin asked, taking Daeun from Changbin and smiling down at her. “Hi, baby. How was your day?”

“Uncle Binnie let me play with his toys!”

“So I see! Were you good for Uncle Binnie?”

“No!”

Seungmin laughed; Changbin shook his head. “She’s been great, Daeun-ah’s always perfect.” Changbin reached over and tugged lightly on a ponytail, making Daeun squeal. “No, I’m okay, just a little annoyed. I wrote a song for one of our girl groups, but they want to give it to a male soloist instead. So I need to completely rearrange it and record a new guide. I’d use Hyunjin like I did before but I’m adding a couple runs at the end now and it’s just slightly out of his range. Mine, too. But Seungminnie has the best voice I've ever heard,” Changbin coaxed, voice dropping into cute territory. “Seungminnie’s voice would be perfect.”

“Ugh, hyung,” Seungmin made a face; he absolutely hated aegyo and had always refused to entertain anyone that tried it on him. Including Changbin. “Fine. I’ll block out a few hours next week for it. That work for you, Your Highness?”

Changbin’s kiss to his cheek was sloppy and its intent was comical, but Seungmin felt his face warm up regardless. The echoing kiss Daeun gave him on his other cheek just made his smile wider, but still. He had no idea what was causing the thickness in his throat, or the prickling behind his eyes, but it suddenly became so carefully, crystal clear how much of Changbin’s life had been upended for him to just drop everything and move in with Seungmin, and just what all that might mean.

\--

Two more dates and Seungmin decided he wanted out of the dating game. He didn’t care if he never met another person over tepid appetizers and even worse small talk ever again. This wasn’t working and he was miserable. He approached each date with a sense of dread and was immediately relieved the second they were over. He was beginning to think he was sabotaging the dates subconsciously, but that made no sense. Why? All he knew was that he was done, he was out, he gave it the old college try and found it just wasn’t for him. Maybe it was still too early. He’d barely been officially divorced less than a year, maybe this was the universe’s way of telling him he needed to focus on himself and Daeun a little longer before bringing someone else into the fold. Maybe romance just wasn’t in the cards for him. Maybe he’d already shot his shot and he wasn’t allowed another go. Maybe a lot of things, but what Seungmin knew for certain was that he was _tired_.

\--

“Try again.”

Seungmin double-checked his file was saved and looked up at where Changbin was standing in the doorway. “Excuse me?”

“Go on another date. Start again.”

Seungmin rolled his eyes. “I think Sookja ajumma is fresh out of nieces.”

Changbin came into the room, cocked his hip against the study desk. “Let me set you up. You said yourself you didn’t want to limit your options. Let me set you up with someone from my company.”

Seungmin paused, wary. “Whom did you have in mind?”

Changbin shrugged. “You did mention that Hyunjinnie was rather pretty when you came to record the other day…”

Seungmin scrunched up his nose. He could tell he did so because Changbin could always be relied on to reach over and tweak it when he did, and he didn't disappoint. “I don’t remember saying that.”

“Okay, maybe you didn’t say that _exactly_ —”

“Thought so.”

“But your eyes said it.”

“I think that was you.”

Changbin’s ever-present smirk made its return. “Not going to lie, I have thought about it. But! This isn’t about me. It’s about you, Minnie.”

“Hyung. No.”

“Hyung, _yes_. Besides, I already asked him for you, and he said yes.”

“He—you— _what_?” Seungmin sputtered.

“So wear something flattering, okay?” Changbin pulled the dish towel off his shoulder as he backed away into kitchen. “No cardigans.”

“I don’t even _own_ a cardigan!”

“No dandy boy hats, either.”

“I hate you, Seo Changbin!”

“That’s ‘I hate you, hyung’ to you!”

\--

Seungmin was getting ready for his date, but his tie was not cooperating. This was silly, he was usually great at tying ties-- he'd certainly done it enough times—but this particular one was being devious. He grumped at his reflection in the mirror.

“What's wrong?”

“Nothing, I—” Seungmin made a face at his reflection as his dumb fingers failed him yet again. “I can't get this stupid tie to lay right.”

“Here, let me see.” Changbin’s fingers were nimble as they turned Seungmin around and unfolded his tie, starting the process anew. Seungmin, for lack of anything else to do, stared at Changbin, memorizing his features for the millionth time. How had he never noticed the small, nay, minuscule scar that bisected his upper lip? It was barely there, so old and fine, it must have happened years ago. Seungmin didn't remember Changbin injuring his mouth when they were kids, though. Unthinkingly, he reached out and touched it, his fingertip big enough to cover the whole scar.

And that's when time stopped.

His brain didn't register what he was doing until he heard Changbin’s quick intake of breath, and then his eyes flicked up. Their gazes locked. They were so close. When did they get so _close_?

Seungmin let his hand drop but the moment had yet to break. For a tiny eternity they just stood there, breathing each other in. Seungmin felt the electricity running down his spine when Changbin’s mouth slackened. It felt strange, exhilarating, but natural all at the same time, to be standing so close, in each other's space, creating a new space that was just them. Unconsciously Seungmin reached up and cupped Changbin’s jaw, his thumb running lightly along the ridge of his cheekbone. “Hyung.” He saw Changbin’s pupils dilate, watched his mouth part, lips splitting at the seam just barely. God, Changbin’s _mouth_ , it was so—

The tug around his neck brought reality crashing in. Changbin cleared his throat and stepped back, slapping lightly at Seungmin’s shoulders. “There. Done.” He quirked a grin at Seungmin that was there and gone in a flash. “Go get em, tiger.”

\--

Hyunjin was every bit as beautiful as Seungmin remembered. And he seemed genuinely interested. But there was something that just didn’t fit quite right from the start, something that told Seungmin this wasn’t it, that he wasn’t it. Hyunjin was perfectly cordial and gentlemanly, and the kiss at the end—a surprise, to be sure—was soft and, and—nice. But it wasn't what Seungmin was looking for. And, when Seungmin tried to think back objectively, he wondered just what _was_ he looking for.

He went back home to Changbin feeling more conflicted than ever. He opened the door to a sight that had his heart doing the weirdest, laziest little flop in his chest. Changbin was laid out on the living room couch, Daeun across him, pudgy cheek smooshed against Changbin’s chest. They were both deeply asleep, Changbin snoring from the way his head was tilted to accommodate Daeun’s wedged under his chin. Seungmin stood there for a long, _long_ moment, a host of thoughts swirling through his head, the first being, of course, “aww,” the others far too heavy for his head. The overwhelming urge to tuck himself in against them both had his fingers twitching. Instead, he bent and carefully untangled Daeun from Changbin, picking her up and carrying her to her bed. Daeun didn't stir once. Giving her a kiss on her temple and smelling the sweet baby smell he hoped she never lost, he righted himself and looked over at a sleepy Changbin, sensing his presence in the doorway.

“Thanks for taking care of her,” Seungmin said, following Changbin out into the hallway and closing Daeun’s door.

“You know I don't mind. I love Daeun. She was great tonight,” Changbin replied, his voice soft. He smiled sleepily up at Seungmin.

“I don't just mean tonight. Hyung, I could never have done this without you. If you hadn't dropped everything, literally your whole life, and come down, I…” Seungmin shrugged helplessly.

“Hey,” Changbin stepped forward, hands on either side of Seungmin's arms, rubbing soothingly. “I didn't drop my whole life. You and Daeun, you _are_ my life. Seungmin, you know I love you both. I would do anything to make you happy.”

Maybe it was the way Changbin’s voice cracked so delicately on that last word, but suddenly Seungmin felt wetness streaming down his face. He pressed his forearm to his eyes, trying to force himself to calm down, but instead a sob broke free.

“Shh, come here,” Changbin pulled Seungmin into his arms and held him tightly, hands warm and reassuring on his back as Seungmin rode out whatever this was curled against Changbin’s shoulder. “It’s okay, you're okay, Daeun is _more_ than okay, she's beautiful and happy and loved, and you did that, alright? That was all you. It's going to be okay, Seungminnie.”

As far as breakdowns went, it was a fairly quiet and uneventful one, but Seungmin knew he'd remember that moment for a long time after. How it felt in Changbin’s arms, so warm and safe. How tight and grounding his hug was, like they always were. How Seungmin saw something that he once associated with regret turn into something that he now associated with determination in Changbin's eyes.

He wondered how he could have spent so long away from Changbin. He’d been so dumb to push him away.

He let go of his hyung reluctantly, turned and went into his bedroom. He spent much of the night thinking about that look he'd seen in Changbin’s eyes.

\--

Seungmin knew he was staring. Knew it was rude. Knew he needed to do or act some way that wasn’t just standing there, staring. At his _best_ _friend_. Who looked _nothing_ like the Seo Changbin he’d grown up with. He—. He—.

“You’re blonde.”

The side of Changbin’s mouth quirked, a tiny bit of familiarity weaving through all the different emotions Seungmin was feeling right then, incredulity leading the charge. “I am.”

“You’re… very blonde.”

Changbin looked down, a hint of insecurity bleeding through all that typical Changbin confidence. “Hyunjin helped me with it. You don't like it?”

Seungmin’s mouth was open. He should do something about that. What, he had no idea. “No. I mean, yes! Yes, I do like it.” Seungmin could feel the blush crawling up his neck, could tell it was noticeable by the amused look Changbin shot him. Could the ground open up and swallow him about now? That would be great. “It’s just a bit of a shock,” he chuckled. “You had dark brown hair this morning.”

Changbin tucked a strand behind one ear. Seungmin was mesmerized by the movement. “Yeah, Hyunjin’s already disavowed the whole thing, said if it all falls out it wasn’t his fault, he tried to stop me, yadda yadda yadda. I’ll still totally sue his ass if I wake up bald tomorrow, though.” He grinned, a quick flash of teeth that looked predatory to Seungmin, that made something low uncurl itself inside of him, paying attention. “Anyway, aren’t you going to get ready for your big date tonight?” A comical waggle of his eyebrows, and all was right in the world again. Seungmin shook his head, rolling his eyes.

“For what, another date you just decided to set me up with against my will? I’ve got hours, hyung. And anyway, why should I even try to look respectable? It hasn’t gotten me anywhere so far. And I don’t even know where I’m going, you won’t tell me.”

“Oh, come on,” Changbin chided gently, turning Seungmin bodily around. “You never know when you’ll meet The One. So, go on, make yourself real pretty while I feed Daeun an early dinner. Turn that frowny caterpillar into a butterfly. I want to see wings, dammit!”

“Hyung,” Seungmin sighed, defeated.

“Wings!”

\--

“Okay, I'm ready now, are you going to tell me where I'm supposed to meet this mystery guy? The suspense is getting kind of old, hyung…” Seungmin trailed off at the sudden appearance of Felix and Chan in his foyer, Daeun in Chan's arms. “Hey, hyung, Felix. Uh, what…?”

“You said we could take Daeun one night for practice, remember? What better night than tonight?” Chan winked at Seungmin. The wink did not clear up any of the confusion Seungmin was feeling, however.

“B-but, what—?”

“Here's the diaper bag with pajamas and an extra change of clothes, just in case. She's mostly got the potty training down, but you can never be too careful. Extra wipes are in the side pocket, I've packed her favorite Binniecorn,” Changbin bent down and nuzzled noses with Daeun, who had already literally wrapped Chan around her tiny little fingers. “You already know her dietary restrictions… I think that's it.”

“Hyung, what is going on? Why are Felix and Chan taking Daeun for the night? What—” Finally, Seungmin caught a good look at Changbin, from the expertly done up makeup down to the tailored suit. “Are you wearing the Dior you just bought?”

“Good eye.” Changbin grinned. “Chan and Felix have agreed to take Daeun-ah for the night. They're going to have so much fun, aren't you?” Changbin said in his best baby voice, addressing Daeun who belted out an emphatic, ‘yes!’ back at him. “She'll hardly be a block away; you already have both Chan and Felix in shortcuts on your phone. It's practically fool proof.”

“But hyung,” Seungmin retorted, exasperated. “ _Why_?”

“If you're really uncomfortable with us watching Daeun, we don't have to,” Felix interjected.

“No, you know I trust you two,” Seungmin pacified. “I just don't get why we need a sitter. Changbin-hyung, where are _you_ going all dressed up?”

“And on that note, I think we'll get going. Say goodbye to Daddy and Uncle Binnie, Daeun!” Chan coaxed. Seungmin hugged and kissed his daughter, made Felix promise to call for anything, no matter how small, and the troop of three marched out the door, led by General Daeun, on their way to conquer ice cream sundaes.

And Seungmin was left alone with Changbin in his two million won suit and his perfectly coiffed, blonde hair. Even the cologne he wore smelled expensive. “Okay, Changbin. Enlighten me. What is going on?”

Changbin pressed his lips together. “How about I just show you?”

Seungmin’s eyes widened as he took in the sight of his laden-down, previously hardly used, dining table. Beautiful camellias framed an extravagantly decked out table full of, from what Seungmin could see, all his favorite dishes. “I—what?”

“Surprise,” Changbin said lightly, hands on Seungmin’s shoulders. “Your date is going to be taking place here tonight.”

Having a sneaking suspicion, but wanting confirmation nonetheless, Seungmin turned around. “And just who am I going on this date with, hyung?”

Changbin hesitated only a moment before bowing deeply. “If you’ll have me, I’d love the pleasure of joining you on a date. Hyunjin gave you such a rave review, after all.” There was a teasing little smile playing around Changbin’s mouth, but it was a decoy, Seungmin could tell, an attempt to hide the nervousness Seungmin could see thrumming through his best friend. It was apparent in the way Changbin couldn’t quite meet his eye; in the way he worried at his bottom lip. Finally, Changbin’s famous composure was shaken.

“You did… all of this… you _cooked_?” Seungmin gestured at the table at large, “for me? To make me feel better?”

“Ah, more like I ordered takeout from all your favorite places.” Changbin’s brows furrowed. “For you, yes. To make you feel better, not exactly... Seungmin…” Changbin took a breath. Seungmin, who seemed to become hyperaware of Changbin as if late, could see a fine tremor running through him, his fingers trembling ever so slightly as he gripped one of the dining room chairs. For strength, maybe? “I am legitimately standing before you, asking if you would go on a date with me. Just one, if that’s all you want it to be, but a real, honest-to-God date. I’m officially throwing myself in your dating pool, to be clear. I’m interested in you, Kim Seungmin. As more than a friend.”

Seungmin was stunned speechless. This was… no, he couldn’t say he hadn’t seen this coming, but he still felt blindsided. He had thought—sincerely thought—he had imagined all those looks. The touches. The _moments_. But he hadn’t.

He hadn’t.

Seungmin could feel his face break out into a wide smile. “Hyung.”

“Seungminnie.”

“Binnie-hyung, yes. _Yes_ , I will go on a date with you.” Changbin’s smile was cinematic. It was the stuff poets went on and on about. It was a Wonpil-led Day6 song. “But if you’re messing with me…”

“I’m not! Minnie!” Changbin whined, stamping his foot a little. It was not charming.

Okay, maybe it was a little.

\--

The date was lowkey. They ate barely a foot from each other, their socked feet idly battling each other under the table. At one point, Changbin hooked his around Seungmin’s ankle, causing a dip in the conversation and a warm flush to creep up Seungmin’s face. They ate slowly, as if they had all the time in the world, phones face down (but nearby, they still had Daeun to think about in the back of their minds), attention easily caught by one another. Seungmin had never had a more relaxing date in his life.

It was, in a word, perfect.

Changbin didn’t push, and Seungmin was grateful, because he was still trying to figure out all the angles dating Changbin would create, and if they would fit in his life. Until he realized with a feather-soft jolt that Changbin was already so deeply entrenched in Seungmin’s life, that to add a romance would be… surprisingly simple. The thought made his flush darken. He could blame the wine, but he wasn’t going to.

They spoke of the past.

“I’m so sorry I didn’t keep in contact. I wanted to—wait. No. I’m going to do this right.” Seungmin took a deep breath. “Changbin-hyung, I stopped contact with you because I was… jealous. If that’s even the right word.”

“Jealous? Of what, my fame? Because I promise, I’m barely famous, Minnie, I don’t even need security at the airport—”

“No, not that. I… the thought of me not being there to experience your triumphs, your lows, your highs, I—hyung.” Seungmin pursed his lips, thinking his words over carefully. “I wanted to be there so much it hurt to just hear about your life. I wanted to be there with you _so badly_. So I ran the other way. I’m so sorry.”

Changbin was quiet for a long moment, and when he spoke it was with a quiet sigh, a rub of his temple. “Seungmin, it wasn’t just your fault we fell out of contact. It was mine, too. I… was also jealous. Of Eunbi. Your wedding was the hardest day of my life. Giving you away to someone else, it was torture. I love you, Seungmin. Even then. Even now. I was happy you were happy, but when you weren’t happy, when you would call to complain about small, mundane things or big things that bothered you I would wonder what if… and that was a dangerous thought to have. So I did my best to not have it.”

Seungmin stared at Changbin, floored. He’d had no idea. “Hyung, why didn’t you ever say anything?”

Changbin shook his head, the laugh small and rueful. “By the time I realized how I felt, you were already head over heels for Eunbi. I saw the way you looked at her. There was no way in hell I was going to jeopardize that for you. Like I told you before, I just wanted to see you happy. And I thought I’d get over it.” He shrugged one shoulder. “I can’t be right all the time, I guess.”

Seungmin laughed, just a barely-there thing, not wanting to ruin the moment. Changbin ducked his head a little, sheepish. “I love making you smile,” he admitted, and though he tried to play it off immediately afterward, Seungmin decided he liked seeing this sentimental side to his hyung.

At the end of the night, Changbin walked Seungmin to his bedroom door and reached up on tiptoe (just a little) to place the softest kiss Seungmin had ever received in his life on his lips. He didn’t deepen it, left it sweet and light and beautiful, and then bid Seungmin good night. Seungmin watched the guest bedroom door close and only waffled for a handful of seconds before striding purposefully across the hall and rapping his knuckles on the wood. The door opened and he watched a smile bloom on Changbin’s face before Seungmin cupped it with both of his hands. He gently guided Changbin back into the room, following in and closing the door for a final time that night. 

Seungmin's family had a dog when he was growing up, an Irish Setter named Rosie, and she used to lay at the foot of his bed and drape her head across his foot while he did homework. It was a treasured memory, one that stuck in his head long after he'd moved away.

Changbin's head on his shoulder in the pale gray dawn evoked a similar feeling.

\--

They weren’t standing at an altar.

Instead, they were standing in their own backyard, surrounded by their family and friends, Daeun between them, her little hands tucked in one each of their own. It didn’t feel like a precipice this time when Seungmin said, “I do;” it felt like home.


End file.
